This week’s post is written by my niece, Angie Wickstrom. I asked her if she would write a post about how my generation could be of help to her generation. Raising families has evolved in the past few years. Many grandparents are now watching their grandkids on a regular basis. Studies have actually found this can be advantageous to everyone, grandparents included. We not only can help with the grandkids, but in other ways too, and I will let Angie share about that. Enjoy the read and check out her own blog, too.
As human beings we long for those meaningful connections with others. We are social creatures by nature and whether we like to admit it or not (like the introvert that I am) we need to be around people. We want to feel like we matter, we are needed, and we want to feel supported. We aren’t meant to go about this life alone!
Having 2 young children at home right now I am learning that I can’t do it all myself. It truly takes a village to help raise the future generations. I am also learning each of my children’s needs individually. I want them to know that no matter what stage of life they are in that I am always right around the corner and their parents are their biggest supporters. Our jobs as parents are never done, we just enter into different stages of parenting as our children grow older and more independent from us. And yes I believe that includes into their adult years!
When you are a young child you look up to your parents and want their acceptance. Heck I want the love and acceptance of my parents even at 27 years old! I am a fully capable adult who has her own home and family making her own big girl decisions. But knowing that my older and much wiser parents are there in every stage of my life brings me such great peace. It doesn’t mean that they hound me every chance they get or push me in the direction they see fit. But they make an honest effort to help and care for my family when it’s needed. I truly appreciate their guidance.
I believe young families have it much harder these days. Things just don’t seem as simple! We have too many schools to choose from, more chemicals in our foods and products, more danger to be aware of, more technology, more opinions, MORE MORE MORE! Maybe it’s just me but a lot of the time I find myself feeling very overwhelmed.
I have a very personal example of a time in which my young family desperately needed support and help. It was about a month after I had my second child that I fell victim to postpartum depression and anxiety. Something I thought of course would never happen to me. You can read my full story over on my blog- https://www.stillinbloom.com/postpartum-anxiety/. I had times where I was physically unable to care for my children let alone myself. If I didn’t have the support from my family (meaning check-ins, watching my kids, helping with meals, praying, and much more) I would have felt even more hopeless than I already did. This was a really scary time for both my husband and I and we needed the care from our families more than ever.
The guidance/support of young families and younger generations is needed and can be done in a variety of ways and through all of life’s curveballs. I am in no way saying you should hold your adult child’s hand through every hardship they will encounter, but like I mentioned earlier I realized it really does take a village to raise a family and even the smallest amount of help makes the world of a difference. It’s very hard for people to ask for help (most will say no when asked or pretend things are okay so they don’t put a burden on someone else) especially a new mom because you think you are supposed to do it all. NO that is impossible!
As a ‘seasoned’ adult you can be there for young families in times of crisis or everyday life! If you don’t want to overstep boundaries ask first if you can help. But your actions speak volumes so I believe it’s perfectly okay to act on a need. A kind gesture can go a long way. A lot of people feel alone in their struggles so opening up about our own and sharing can open the doors to deeper connections, new friendships, and with that comes some mental peace. Without my mom to confide in during my postpartum depression I would have had drained my husband mentally, pay way too much for a therapist (I did try this but it just wasn’t up my alley), or probably scare my friends away.
So parents, be there for your children! Leave your opinions and judgement at the door and give a listening ear and helping hand. Or if you are a young adult take my advice and ask for help and accept any help given to you! Get over the lie that you need to be a superhuman and do it all. Us humans were designed to work together as teammates so let’s all lift each other up and give a helping hand. After all our children and the future generations are watching us!
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